If I ever had a son I would call him Ian. Let me explain why.
A friend of mine who is pregnant recently shared with me how she has had to face her fears concerning labour and the well-being of her child. I was struck by how exact the parallels were with carrying a dream. Admittedly everything runs parallel with living your dream for me at the moment, but this resonated deeply.
She mentioned those who offered unsolicited and sometimes unwelcomed advice. Then there were some who thought that because her belly was protruding it gave them the right to reach out and touch it. But what bothered her most of all were those, some of whom had never even been pregnant, who although genunely excited for her, found it necessary to help prepare her for how painful labour was going to be.
Have you ever had that? You share an idea and everyone tells you how great it is but how difficult it would be to make it a reality. Then they back it up with evidence that dreams are always borne out of our place of pain, like labour for instance. But, as my friend said, ” I didn’t understand why I’d have to deliver with torment, or deep pain. I couldn’t quite understand the use for it, or its purpose.”
Before we go further I want to address one point and encourage you to practise setting your expectations for good. Often times things get difficult because we made wrong decisions or needed more wisdom to make our dreams come true. Then out of that sticky situation God creates something beautiful – something so beautiful that we kid ourselves into believing that maybe the bad thing happened so that good could come of it. Then we start making a doctrine out of there being purpose in the pain and then we take that even a step further to say that without pain no great thing can come.
In fact, it is usually the case that great things happen in spite of (not because of)the bad that preceded them. It is the greatness of God that no matter what mess we get ourselves into He can turn it around so well that we almost think it was meant to be that way. But it did not have to be that way. This may shock you but it’s supposed to be easy.
So you can imagine my friend’s excitement when she met a woman who had given birth naturally and pain free, not once but three times. There was intensity, but not pain. She explained that there was work to be done to push out the child, but knowing your body and what it’s made for, and working with it, will bring about the labour experience you’ve been made to go through naturally.
And I can’t tell you how excited I was because my friend shared with me ten things that she learnt and when I changed the words ‘child’ and ‘your body’ to ‘dream’ and ‘You’ I was amazed at how insightful this is for all of us who are carrying a dream. So I thought I would share them with you.
1. You are made to carry your dream and see it full-term, and to deliver your dream safely.
2. Fear and anxiety cause you to stop functioning naturally-and with this there is pain brought forth. Knowing who you are and what you are carrying prevents you from being fearful, allowing you to deliver your dream naturally.
3. Listening to negative experiences, thoughts and feelings, cause your judgment to be clouded. These make you fearful, confused, and doubTful and cause you to lose focus.
4. During labour, focus on what You are doing/feeling/thinking. Your dream chamber (uterus) is surging through with energy to allow your dream to come out, with the head first, and chin tucked in. [Head first and chin tucked in symbolises that everything is in good order and timing. If the chin is pushed foward it symbolises that the head is pushing through before the body is ready to follow and makes for very painful and dangerous delivery].
5.Spend your time imagining this process, and practise working with your dream.
6. Learn what the different parts of your dream are for, and then learn to facilitate it doing what it’s naturally made to do.
7. Learn how to breathe in sync with your dream.
8. Immerse yourself in positive testimonies, of real people’s experiences- who have experienced the natural outworking of the dream chamber.
9.Learn to use different words that have positive connotations and better reflect what is happening naturally – eg surge instead of contraction.
10. Start speaking to your dream from now to prepare both yourself and your dream to experience natural birthing.
The God who has given you your dream has made it easy, by His grace, for you to deliver it and, if you (like me) have ever messed up, you may experience pain but He will still cause you to birth something unbelievably beautiful. Either way, His grace prevails. That’s why if I ever had a son I would call him Ian. It means God is gracious.
Join us for the I Will Tell (aka Ian) international film festival at the Coronet cinema, Notting Hill from 30 August to 9 September. www.iwilltell.com